No 1 Remember me- Michael Palin on care homes or your own home?
MP says older people should remain in their own homes. Surely people need more options than this when they don’t want to be lonely or be anxious about maintaining a property - We need a graduated pathway that does not necessarily fall in the ‘care home’ category. A transition model, such as retirement villages with extra care with graduated support, with more attractive financing models to enable people to re connect socially rather than deteriorate alone in their existing homes, frequently disconnected and emotionally deprived. We know what a huge negative impact social isolation and loneliness has on health and wellbeing.
Our obsession with individualism and independence is a flawed argument as we should aim for relatedness as a model focusing on relationships and inter dependence. Both of my parents suffered from the effects of isolation. Bricks and mortar are not the only humane definition of HOME. Home it is about being known, being able to still contribute, love and be loved – Michael, a creative person such as yourself who is seen as one of the ‘nicest people’ in British media may need some education in the realities of living alone with a long term condition or frailty, particularly if you are a sociable person and needs more than a care worker descending at uncertain times and such short visits during a day, although this works well for many.
Also we should not see it as a failure if someone needs a care home, particularly as our Post Modern consumerist, ‘immediate ‘society has not resolved the economic drivers that fragment families and distance care can sometimes be the norm – Southern European countries are following the same direction of travel.
What we need is massive investment into the sector that has been neglected, underdeveloped and airbrushed out as a bygone, outdated ‘ institutional model’ . There are bad and good institutions and it is the culture and quality of relationships that we all know from our workplaces that create the good experience we want. You only have to look at good boarding schools, although only accessible to a few, or the ‘espris de corps’ within our military in Afghanastan to know that. Society is crying out for places that provide the positive relational support, learning and workforce status that our elders deserve and Baby Boomers expect to see, particularlyif they cannot stay at home to live well.
Flourishing communities only happen where people care and have sufficient time to care and are well led and equipped to do so in ways that are acceptable to us all when we get old . We would all like to have hope, confidence and certainty that the right people with the right skills will be there at some point when it is needed.
This blog is written from a personal perspective