Many of us, and I count myself in this group, have lived life in the fast lane far too much, with little time left to reflect and consider. I am getting better at this now. Hitting the pause button is now a universal experience. The question is what does it bring? What reserves can we pull on? How can we apply previous learning to something we have never experienced?

One of my best reads this year on health and wellbeing has been Sally Davies and Jonathan Pearson- Stuttard’s book, Whose Health is it Anyway, published in November. It sets out a total health ecosystem where local government, business, the Private Sector, and social and commercial drivers invest in health, prevention etc.,

There has been a coming together of thinkers who come from different disciplines, including economists, policy developers and health professionals. They are all saying things that now need to be listened to and incorporated into the recovery programme into the New Year.

The Death word, as a normal part of life’s cycle is important to bring out into the open and everyday parlance, particularly with children’s education in mind as it is part of our life course.

The power of the smile is known and experienced by us all, particularly important for those living with dementia. I found in visiting my mother for many years across different care homes I visited as both a professional and a relative non verbal communication and human connection without words are part of the poetry and pain of dementia.

Care homes need to be fully integrated part of the wider system that is focusing on person centred outcomes over tasks. I am eager to tackle this one as soon as we are able to emerge from the Covid war of uncertainty.

‘Stop-watch’ care home visits, lack of transparency of life in a care home since lock down, fear, occupational deprivation and boredom and the rising burden of insurance bills …..

I remember a time when I visited a care home and I caught the eye and smiled at a lady who was walking towards me down a corridor, momentarily lost in her own world. She looked up and came up very close, cupped my face and stroked it in gentle caresses. She had no words. I had never met her, but her soft nurturing touch was powerful, and I shall never forget it as a response to warm engagement.

We have heard a lot about the sense of touch recently on the radio. Touch ‘hunger’ has been proposed as a syndrome that people feel when they have been deprived of sufficient human touch.
For those in care, the functional touch to assist in every day activity is still experienced but other forms of touch are less likely as we have become ‘touch sensitive’ with physical distancing required of this Covid virus control.

Since the beginning of time, whatever your beliefs the human condition is programmed to form meaningful relationships with others. These can take different forms. We know that we are valuable human beings throughout the life course, from cradle to grave. Sadly, our society and how it is structured tends to still be ageist although we have added years to life through good public health over the years, for us to enjoy. - Read more……

Getting children out of their digital world into natural outdoors has been recognised as pivotal during this time. The attention span on under 16 year olds Generation Z is recorded by Ofcom research at 8% and regular social media checks within an hour of waking up is 73% on average! Read on……

In my professional life working in many different care homes, I have been saddened by the lack of understanding about the increasing need for a higher set of gerontology skills and lack of recognition of the need for dedicated specialist generalists in the care of older people. Care homes are dealing with people with the most complex conditions and probably is the only sector that is managing long term conditions on a daily basis. This is unlike the NHS who is set up to treat acute episodes of illness. - read more….

Making relatives feel at home is an essential ingredient for a good care home. This has not changed over time. It is about feeling welcome and having a good visiting experience, knowing who is who, having timely information and being involved in the care to the extent that worked for my mother, being able to raise concerns without fear of retribution and feeling part of the community of the home.

What is ‘old’? What does it mean today? How can 65 now be the cut off point when an 80 year old can expect to live another 10 years? Structural ageism will need to be challenged as we enter the 100 year life.

It was a very strange feeling leaving the UK via Gatwick which was completely desolate with very few people and services operating. It seemed rather like a ghost town in North terminal. It felt as if we were escaping the ‘new normal’.

Keeping older people connected with families and memories is fundamental to the mental wellbeing of both.

Keeping up with the advice changes, feeling unprotected without equipment and living with high levels of risk has made care homes vulnerable and exposed. Being without the NHS ‘ring of immunity’ with promised funding bound by complexity has added to stress. Money furred up in arteries of bureaucracy in local government created delays or not reaching care homes at all in some cases when speed was of the essence for infection control.

Our ageing population was not an issue in previous pandemics as people died younger. More people are at risk now. It creates tensions between generations and other communities; the need to ‘work’ for longer or contribute in ways that can be recognised as public benefit.

Let us start with how the significance of those around us has come into the new spotlight - how do we relate to others so we can help each other out rather than living in an impersonal bubble?

Kindness can transform someone’s dark moments like a blaze of light. As we come out the other side of this, the likelihood is one that we will see an increase in mental health challenges and a deeper awareness of the importance of keeping well and the whole aspect of prevention and we could do well to challenge the toxic aspects of living which has affected our health and wellbeing. We need to ask searching questions about our lifestyle and how it impacts our health and realise that our attitudes and our ‘arteries’; everything is connected.